Standing on the grounds of education
An ashen-faced youth appeared
Who congealed rooms with his rumination
Unaware of the culmination
That his torment will spread far and wide
Until he finds a way to turn the tide
If I knew how long it would take
Would I have continued?
The years of heartbreak compounded
With a shiver of promise evanescent
Infantile joys that led elsewhere
And yet, I never surrender
When will it be enough?
Can atonement be weighed in guts?
Extasy has a broken charm
So now I tell myself a different yarn
One constructed from hope’s thin air
A resolve born from my woe’s river
My life is a funeral
With remains from a raging pyre
I am a black-furred feline
Fawning over a perished shrine
With more than nine lives
Purring to the end of times
I am a stranger and a friend
Homeless world citizen
Let me borrow your hurt
And give laughter in return
Intrinsically different, withered
The weak, the preyed-upon, the other
I will forever be your faithful brother
So I hold out my hand to the oppressed
May you all be free of torment
For you are human too
More than they would ever know
They often forget so
As they are running the show
The real face appears now
But you may not want to see mine
For its truth is blinding, naked, with piercing eyes
My gaze resemblant to bleeding clouds
Where a deaf and blind crow flies
And ghouls growl lethal goodbyes
Torrents of hate have eaten their way into my brain
There’s no tough guy here
Just a human precipice
My hate as deep as my love
Trickling inside the blackest of blood
With many different ways to fall
Can I love you all?
The fear is subsiding
I can see a glade glowing
Or is it wasted on you?
Can I dedicate myself to clearing the world of sorrow?
I always recognize buffoonery
He’s a friend that I know intimately
But I would much prefer tomfoolery
So we can all get along famously
As it may not be so serious
My hardship can be hilarious
Even when life is decrepit
Maybe it’s fine to be happy
I look into your interior
There is no gaze superior
Than the look of decisive feeling
Where we witness each other’s seeing
Nothing can break me
I’ve been touched by death
Turning mind and body into weapons
To rectify all the gruesome patterns
That talk of shame, guilt, and anger
And as my feet leave the ground
My ascent becomes magnified
As feathers of my heels sprout
Leaving the abyss behind
And when you ask what have I learned
My recollection leaves me hanging
The vastness of my infant being
Dancing, dancing away, relenting
The twin silence is a distant cry
All I know today, at this hour, at this time
Is that suddenly, I no longer want to die.
A resurrection
A volcano of affliction
Morphing hurt into tenderness
What I have in me is a furnace
Home is everywhere and anywhere
We live inside our purpose there
And as we stare into each other’s glare
We breathe the same gentle air.
Prince of Darkness – A poem written by Ágoston Hajnal
